Summer of Tears
by ThominhoNalbyfan29
Summary: It's the summer after Harry's 5th year. Sirius had just died and a depressed Harry is living with the Dursleys. But when Harry runs away after a fight with Vernon, he gets taken by Death Eaters. Rated T for now. HPRL slash.
1. Chapter 1

Harry sat in his room at Grimmauld Place, a photo album in his lap that Remus had given him. He was sitting on his bed flipping through it, and he got to a picture of himself, Sirius, and Remus at the beach hours away from Muggle London. He flipped the page and found himself staring at a picture of his parents, Remus, Sirius, and Peter Pettigrew standing in front of the Hogwarts Express, students hurrying to get on the train in the background.

Sighing, he closed the book and lay down on his bed. His heart ached to go back to Grimmauld Place with Remus, his guardian and now his boyfriend, but it would just hurt him because Sirius wouldn't be there. He'd died out of Harry's own stupidity, and he was pretty sure Remus hated him for it now.

The summer of fourth year had been the best three months of Harry's life. He and Sirius and Remus had been a family, and Harry's only problem had been his growing crush on Remus. Which had definitely been a problem, and sure it had been hard keeping it to himself, but at least he hadn't been living with the Dursleys.

Speaking of which- "BOY!" Vernon yelled from downstairs. "Get down here! NOW!"

"Coming, Uncle Vernon," Harry called, getting out of bed and almost tripping down the stairs.

"There's a _freak_ here to see you," Vernon snarled. "He's in the living room. I told him you weren't to have visitors, but-"

Harry pushed past him and stopped in the kitchen when he saw Remus. "Harry," Remus sighed, looking relieved.

"Remus!" Harry felt a rush of happiness, the first he'd felt since Sirius died. Since he'd killed Sirius. He threw himself into his boyfriend's arms, not caring that the Dursleys were watching. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see if you were all right." Remus pulled back and brushed hair out of Harry's eyes.

"I'm all right now," Harry declared, and Remus smiled.

"Disgusting," Dudley commented and left the room, but neither Harry or Remus were paying attention.

"Do you want to go on a walk in the park?" Remus asked him. Harry nodded and followed Remus outside. It was raining slightly, but Remus didn't seem to care and Harry didn't either. "Harry, look. Hermione wrote to me and told me how depressed you were after...what happened-"

"You can say it, Remus," Harry said flatly.

Remus sighed and continued. "I know how upset you are. I feel the same way, trust me."

"I never told him I love him," said Harry as they reached the park.

"Oh, Harry. He knew, he really did, and he loved you too. I'm not just saying it. He told me."

Harry managed a weak smile. "I miss him so much." His eyes filled with tears.

Remus hugged him. "I know, Harry," he murmured. "I miss him, too."

They fell silent then. Tell him, a voice insisted. Harry and Remus had been together for a while, but Harry had never told Remus that he loved him, thinking that he might scare Remus off. But now was the perfect chance, and he wouldn't see Remus until term started since he'd be teaching at Hogwarts again. "I love you, Remus."

Remus looked at him, surprised. He smiled. "I love you too, Harry." He kissed Harry softly, and Harry closed his eyes and kissed back. They had never kissed out in the open like this, but no one was out here and if they were Harry didn't care. When Remus broke their kiss, he said, "We should probably go back. It's raining harder now anyways."

They went back to the house, and kissed outside before Remus Apparated, probably back to Grimmauld Place since he was moving into Hogwarts. Harry went inside, but Vernon stopped him at the door.

"I told you no visitors, boy," he said.

"I didn't know," Harry protested, trying to go upstairs but his uncle wouldn't let him. "Leave me alone!" He pulled his wand out of his pocket and pointed it at Vernon. Petunia, who was watching with Dudley from a distance, shreiked. Vernon moved to grab him but Harry was faster, and he ran upstairs and locked his door.

Harry got his trunk out of his closet and immediately began throwing his clothes in it. He grabbed his photo album off the bed and put it in, then closed his trunk and grabbed Hedwig's cage. Hedwig woke up and Harry apologized to her before opening the door. He grabbed his trunk and went back downstairs.

"Where are you going, boy?" Vernon grabbed his arm.

"Get off!" Harry yanked his arm away. "Anywhere but here." He remembered himself saying something similar the summer before his third year. He ignored Vernon's yelling and went outside in the rain.


	2. Chapter 2

Remus' PoV:

Remus stood in his room at Grimmauld Place, wondering where to begin packing. Part of him still couldn't believe he was actually moving out, and that part of him didn't want to pack at all. That would mean that Sirius really was gone, that he would never come back...

He stopped and took a deep breath. Sirius was gone, and staying here wouldn't change that. Instead he would be living in a dark, depressing house by himself, instead of going back to Hogwarts as a teacher. He knew what Sirius would want him to do.

He had put his large suitcase on the bed and was unzipping it when he heard his name being called. "Remus!"

Tonks. What was Tonks doing here? "Tonks?"

She appeared in the doorway. "Remus, Harry's missing!"

Remus' heart almost stopped. "What? What do you mean?"

"I mean, he's missing!" she repeated, exasperated. "The rest of the Order is in the kitchen. We need to come up with a plan to save him!"

Remus followed her downstairs, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. Harry had been fine earlier today when he had visited him. When Remus was there, at least, he'd even seemed happy. And now the Order was telling him that Harry ran away, and was taken by Death Eaters? "Where is he now?" he demanded.

"Malfoy Manor," Tonks informed him. "With Voldemort."

Harry's PoV:

Flashback-

_Harry gazed out at the beautiful water, leaning against the railing of the bridge. It had been two days since Sirius died, and he could feel himself slipping into depression. He had never felt so alone, even though Ron and Hermione worried about him, and so did Ginny, Neville, Luna and the rest of his friends. He'd talked to Luna yesterday, she understood what losing someone felt like and they had a long conversation. But it just wasn't the same as having a family. Sirius had been his only family, and he was dead. _

_ He felt a hand on his shoulder, and he turned to see Remus. He smiled slightly and turned his gaze back to the water, not even bothering to ask what he was doing at Hogwarts. Remus went to stand beside him. "I know how you feel, Harry," he said. "I miss him too."_

_ Tears fell from Harry's eyes. "I miss him so much," he sobbed, and he felt arms wrap around him. Remus held him while he cried, stroking his hair and rubbing his back until he finally calmed down. _

_ "I miss him too, Harry." Harry let out a shuddering breath and rested his cheek against Remus' shoulder. "You are not alone in this."_

_ "I loved him," Harry pointed out. "No one understands what I'm going through! Not Ron, or even Hermione. Luna is the only person I can talk to and after a few weeks I'll be away from her and everybody I care about! My parents were taken from me and Sirius has been taken from me. And then I have to go live with the Dursleys, who I hate and treat me like shit!" In his rage, Harry noticed Remus didn't get mad at him for cursing. "I'm so worried that-" Harry stopped, he had been about to say "I'm so worried that you'll be taken from me" but then he'd be telling Remus he loved him, which would probably scare him. _

_ "You're worried that what, Harry?" Remus was such a good person for listening to him bitch about his life and not even yelling back at him. He just looked...calm. _

_ "I don't want to lose you," Harry made himself say, swallowing. _

_ Harry didn't know when it had happened, or how, but suddenly they were kissing. His hands were in Remus' light brown hair, he was running his fingers through it like he'd imagined himself doing so many times. They seemed to fit perfectly together, Remus' lips were soft and warm against his and Harry could feel Remus' heart beating fast against his. Nothing had ever felt this right to Harry. _

_ "Harry," Remus gasped, his breath hot against Harry's lips. _

_ "Remus," Harry whimpered, holding a fistful of Remus' shirt. They kissed again and Harry felt himself being swept into Remus' arms. _


	3. Chapter 3

"Harry."

Harry shivered at the cold voice as the warmth of his memory/dream left him. He knew that Remus wasn't with him even before he opened his eyes, but was shocked at who was with him.

Voldemort.

He was in a cold cell, but he had no idea where he was. Shivering, he pressed himself against the wall. "Voldemort."

The Dark Lord smirked. "We meet again," he said. "And I will kill you for sure this time."

Fear took control over Harry's other emotions. "Kill me," he said. "But leave Remus alone."

"Ah, yes, your werewolf lover," Voldemort spat. "He will come after you, and he'll be trapped here. We'll kill both of you."

"Harry!" a agonized voice screamed. Harry looked up to see Remus standing outside the cell with the rest of the Order.

"Perfect," Voldemort laughed.

"Remus, don't!" Harry yelled. "You have to leave now!"

"I'm not leaving you Harry!" he called.

And then chaos erupted. The Order was surrounded, curses were thrown. "No!" Harry sprang to his feet and searched for his wand, then pulled it out of his shoe. "_Confringo_!" Harry shouted, hitting one of Voldemort's Death Eaters. He screamed as the fire burned him, and Harry began to make his way towards Remus. He threw himself into Remus' arms, sobbing, and Remus held him tightly.

"_Avada Kedavra_!" Voldemort shouted, and before Harry knew it the curse was coming towards Remus.

"Harry!" Remus yelled as Harry pushed Remus behind him. There was an explosion of green light and then Harry knew nothing.


	4. Chapter 4

"But...isn't there anything you can do for him?" Remus asked Madame Pomfrey for the ten millionth time. He was crying, had been crying ever since they got back to Grimmauld Place.

Madame Pomfrey's eyes were full of sadness. "I'm so sorry, Remus," she said, looking on the verge of tears. "I can't tell you how sorry I am. But he's dead."

Just hearing it sent a rush of sadness through Remus that was so strong. First Sirius, and now Harry. He'd lost his whole family in a matter of months. "Isn't there a charm or something, a healing charm, something we haven't thought of yet? A potion, maybe. Maybe Severus knows-"

"Think then, Remus," said Pomfrey. "You were one of the smartest in your class. You know about charms and spells, if there was a spell we could use to bring people back from the dead, I know you would be able to figure it out."

"Then...we can make one then, right?" Remus said. "Invent one."

She smiled sadly. "He's dead, Remus," she said. "There's nothing we can do. If he was close to death, we may have been able to save him, but the curse killed him. I'm sorry."

Remus sank down into the chair beside Harry's bed and buried his face in his hands, letting out huge and very loud sobs. "Harry," he wept. He would give anything to feel his mate's warm lips on his, just once more so he could savor the kiss. "Harry."

The hospital door opened again and two people came running in, by the sound of their footsteps. "Harry!" Hermione's voice shreiked. "Please, Professor Lupin, tell me it's not true.

Remus looked up to see both Ron and Hermione were crying. "H-he's dead," Remus said, tears streaming down his face. "You can see him if you want."

Ron went over to Harry's bedside and brushed hair out of Harry's eyes. "Why did you have to go and get yourself killed, Harry?" he sniffled.

"It's my fault," said Remus, and the two looked at him.

"I'm sure that's not true, Professor," Hermione said.

"It is," Remus told her. "He stepped in front of me and took the Killing Curse for me. I should be dead. I should be dead." He buried his face in his hands and cried, not wanting to believe the death of his mate.


	5. Chapter 5

It had been three days since Remus found out Harry was dead.

He didn't leave his mate's bedside. At night he slept in the bed beside Harry (he refused to say Harry's body, because it felt like giving up). Remus felt like it wasn't over, like there was something they could do, like there was something they weren't noticing. But it was over. Voldemort had won, killed his lover and then killed his new lover when Remus tried to start a relationship with someone else.

_No one else for me_, Remus promised himself._ I won't let anyone else get killed._  
It was a day later when he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. Turning around to see who it was, he saw it was Tonks. Normally he would be happy to see her, but he felt nothing. He didn't think he would ever feel anything again, especially not love, whether it was with a man or a woman.

"Remus," Tonks said. "You know Harry would want you to move on." She sat down beside him in a chair.

"Everyone I love dies," Remus said. "Harry thought the same thing, but it's really me. I loved Sirius and Harry, I still do, and they're both dead."

She sighed and held his hand, and Remus couldn't bring himself to love her even when she comforted him. They stayed like that for a long time, the only sound in the room being Remus' quiet weeping.

* * *

Three days later was Harry's funeral. The service would be held in the Great Hall and they would bury Harry in the cemetery where his parents, James and Lily, were buried. Harry's coffin was in the hospital wing, and his body lay in it.

Remus stood up for the first time in a day, his eyes red and shadows under his eyes. "Goodbye, Harry," he wept, placing a last kiss on Harry's lips.

When he pulled back, there was something strange about Harry's scar.

It was bleeding.


End file.
